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Basic Public Health and Epidemiology Information for General Audiences

Also note- much of the Covid-19 specific info is towards the bottom.

Attention- this is a work in progress.

Note: not medical advice.

Reason for this project- to give public a (hopefully) less biased view of science and to educate on public health basics.

My background: What makes me qualified to teach this subject? Extensive scientific education- have spent significant time working in public health- education, prevention, tropical diseases educating on all aspects of public health, epidemics, endemic diseases and vaccines. Graduate work as a master of science in public health. Licensed for medical practice.

General Relevant Medical Terminology Different Types of Disease Causing agents:

Antigen- something foreign in your body that will cause an immune response. Examples can be parasite, virus, bacteria, toxic chemicals, fungus.

“virus”: Infectious agent of small size that only multiples in a host (example person or animal)

Bacteria: similar to virus but more chemically “complicated”. Some live in our bodies naturally and it’s not a problem.

Microbe: a very small creature that we cannot usually see without a microscope. So viruses, bacteria, fungi, etc.

Morbidity: diseases that can ultimately strongly impact state of health- example: heart disease or obesity.

Mortality: commonly used as a “rate”- indicates how often a certain disease actually kills people. Example- heart disease kills X number of people per year.

Viral Load: *not exact definition* repeated exposure to a virus causes a person to be more likely to actually get the virus.

Pandemic: defined by the World Health Organization as “when a disease’s growth is exponential. This means growth rate skyrockets and each day cases grow more than the day prior”- source- publichealth.Columbia.edu

Therefore, according to WHO and Columbia (as well as other sources) we are no longer in a pandemic state as the disease in this case (Covid-19) is not growing at an “exponential rate”. Aka- it’s slowed down- ALOT.

Pharmaceutical Companies Target Kids: In January 2021, Pfizer finished enrolling 2,200 teens aged 12-15 in a clinical trial. Modena finished enrolling 3,000 teens aged 12-17 in its own study in February 2021- source cen.acs.org/. As of March, this age group was “approved” to receive the experimental vaccine* (*error- governmental sources were stating that the vaccine was safe for this age group and pushing for emergency authorization, but apparently not approved at this time (May 2, 2021).

How Humans Become Immune to things/How Immune System Works:

What are the different types of immunity to diseases? “Acquired by disease”- example- chicken pox. There is now a vaccine for this but it is one of the “newer” vaccines, meaning most adults have had the disease. Chicken pox is a virus, symptoms range from many itchy, red bumps all over the body lasting for a week or so to more mild symptoms such as only a few bumps. In no the cases, a person who has had the chicken pox disease is immune for life. The disease is not usually deadly. “Acquired immunity”- immune by vaccine.

What are the most common types of vaccines are how do they work?

Live vaccine: a small part of the virus or bacteria or microbe is administered usually by injection to the host (patient). The quantity of the microbe that is put into the hosts body is not enough to make him or her seriously ill, but is the most powerful and most long lasting way for the host to build immunity to the disease aside from actually having had the full blown disease. This type of vaccine usually has the most side effects and is not recommended for pregnant women, anyone who is immunocompromised due to disease or medications they make take.

Inactivated vaccine: particles of the microbe are introduced by injection to the host body and the body’s immune response reacts in a more mild way. These vaccines tend to have booster shots and traditionally do not last as long as live vaccines.

What are antibodies??

Definition of antibody: “proteins (immunonoglobulins) that are made in response to an antigen (virus, bacteria, germs, essentially) and can recognize and bind that antigen. Antibodies can help neutralize or destroy the antigen. Antibodies are highly specific in recognizing the original antigen” (source: Tortora, G. Funke, B. Case, C. Microbiology: An Introduction. 8th edition, published by Pearson. San Francisco, CA 2004*). I will continue to refer to this textbook throughout the article. Antibodies make molecules (compound structures)- an illustration will also be provided. Antibody structure (most basic) is a “Y” shape- having a “stem” and two arms. Antibodies are made by B cells.

Immunoglobulins: 5 classes: IgG- the Y shaped structure that makes up 80% of blood antibodies. Others are IgM, IgA, IgD, and IgE. IgG is most common in blood. Other immunoglobulins are more common in other parts of the body, such as mucus (for example). IgA is the most abundant immunoglobulin in the body*. “The main function of secretory IgA is probably to prevent the attachment of pathogens, particularly viruses and certain bacteria to mucosal surfaces. This is especially important in resistance to respiratory pathogens” (source- same textbook as indicated by asterisk*)

Testing for antibodies:

Laboratory testing for antibodies to novel coronavirus: blood test (that you may get in doctors office). Tests vary from site to site. There does not appear to be one uniform test. If you are tested by blood and have had the vaccine recently – you will likely test positive for antibodies. If you are tested and have NOT had the vaccine, you may still test positive for antibodies but it is unlikely unless the body has recently been exposed to the virus (aka antigen). This does not indicate presence or lack of long term immunity- IgG alone.

General antibody testing- Having no clear antibodies by blood test does not mean the body has not developed immunity to a disease. This is because antibodies are produced after being exposed to the antigen (whatever it may be). Immune memory cells will mount a response of antibodies if it encounters the antigen again several days after being exposed and may last for a few months at most. Therefore, antibody testing is not indicative of whether a person is immune to something or not.

To address: B cells, memory cells, primary and secondary response to antigen. Further examples of antigens also to be provided. B cell activation is necessary to mount an immune response-

Differences between antigens- antigens can be bacteria, virus, parasite, anything attacking the body (foreign substance that can cause illness). Famous example- cold virus or flu virus…another common one is E. Coli which is normally present to some degree in the intestines of humans and animals but when ingested, causes serious symptoms. Often considered a “food borne” illness.

Check this out as it is very similar to what’s going on now:

Polio Scare 1935-1960. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1383764/. see The Cutter vaccine- infected 40,000 people with polio virus- many partially recovered, some suffered paralysis at the site or administration. Famous advocate against Polio- American president FDR who contracted it as an adult and became paralyzed from the waist down. Started what is now know as The March of Dimes.

Contradictions from the American Government About Covid-19:

BMJ reports that those who have recovered from Covid-19 “may only need one dose”. Comes straight from the mRNA manufacturers- Pfizer and Moderna. https://www.bmj.com/content/372/bmj.n308

Also recent reports of vaccinated (with mRNA vaccines side effects including shingles and cold sores. Not widely reported on and of course, minimized by American press. Shingles (and cold sores) part of herpes viral family. Details somewhat sketchy and unbiased info hard to find. Unbiased= raw data.

Viral vector shedding- am investigating which vaccines are “competent” in replication- meaning that they may cause disease- even if it’s not the disease that the vaccine intends.

So what’s up with the experimental Covid19 shot?

Short answer- it’s an experimental shot.

Manufactures of vaccine are claiming that mRNA vaccines have no ability to “replicate”. Have not been able to definitively find data to refute this, HOWEVER, in Pfizer’s study detailing the experiments regarding the Covid-19 shot, mention is made of “unintended recipients of treatment (aka the shot)” and defines this as “family members NOT undergoing treatment (experimental shot), fetuses of pregnant women receiving “the treatment” and infants breastfeeding to mothers receiving the treatment. This suggests that THERE IS concern that people in close contact may be exposed to substances in the shot somehow.

In live vaccines- example yellow fever or MMR- nurses are advised to tell people getting those vaccines that it is possible that they can shed the virus through close contact with family members.

That Fauci guy says a lot of stuff- should we trust him? He may be happy if nobody remembers this:

Don’t forget (reminder to self) to detail failed HIV vaccination attempts Anthony Fauci.

So Fauci did this: 2007 STEP Trial HIV Vaccine gives people HIV:

So if I get the experimental Covid shot- will I get Covid?

Some Covid-19 vaccines using viral vector techniques. Non medical terminology explanation- vaccine manufacturers are claiming that the mRNA type of “vaccine” does not carry actual Covid-19. I believe that. What they put in are “instructions” on how to make antibodies to the Covid-19 virus. But there is a catch. The catch is that there needs to be a vector (something that carries something else like a virus) for the body to accept this information. The vector that is being used in some of these shots is called “adenovirus”- also known as “common cold” .

There are many many strains of the common cold. Many people are immune to a lot of them because we have kids or leave our homes, so we’ve gotten these colds and gotten over them and our bodies remember that. That is how our bodies are designed. One issue with using this new system of vaccines is that some of us are already immune to the vector (the cold virus they use to transmit the info) and if you’re not already immune to the type (strand) of cold virus they use- you will be after they give it to you. Again, because your body remembers this cold. This is a challenge in the new “vaccine” because that means that it may not work for a lot of people. https://www.clinicaltrialsarena.com/comment/adenovirus-vectored-covid-19-vaccines-efficacy-during-a-potential-revaccination/

What are other countries doing with the Covid shots? Why aren’t they giving it to everyone?

I put “vaccine” in quotes because I am not 100% sure that this can legally be called a vaccine given that it is experimental. And yes, it is still experimental status according to every government I think in the world.

Many countries have stopped recommending the use of this “vaccine” because of the likelihood that many people may already be immune to the vector that they use.

Back to immunity by disease regarding Covid-19. (Link to NIH) https://www.nih.gov/news-events/nih-research-matters/lasting-immunity-found-after-recovery-covid-19?fbclid=IwAR1q4YFE56tAf0IEmOCaYUSVsHhM6-A_7y2m4P-Sa_flDa8hRWmX3kWnv3k

Some of the studies have shown that people who have already had Covid-19 are having more severe reactions to the shot. Pfizer shows this-

MASKS:

https://www.who.int/images/default-source/health-topics/coronavirus/mask_exercise_outdoor_ok.jpeg?sfvrsn=f7339b45_1
CDC says masks decrease chance of transmitting Covid-19 by 0.5%

https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/70/wr/mm7010e3.htm?fbclid=IwAR0XD9e3h4pmmu7Ehz3GhSd5p-lMsuDXjITcySqXk7JBhdrpCtpgMslbHzQ

Medical Professionals Speak Out Against Experimental Shots and Lockdowns:

https://www.city-journal.org/lockdowns-must-end?wallit_nosession=1

The Great Barrington Declaration

On Mandating Experimental Shots:

Federal Law Prohibits Mandates of Emergency Use COVID Vaccines, Tests, Masks — 3 Resources You Can Use to Inform Your School or Employer

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The Epidemic That Doesn’t Make The Papers

By: Kristina Tehrani

2/10/2021, revised 3/16/2021

          Today I stopped by the gas station and as I was browsing for my favorite bottled tea, I happened across the newspaper stand. There were two publications- The Saint Paul Pioneer Press and the Minneapolis Star Tribune. The headlines were nearly identical. This is not a direct headline from today because I don’t recall exactly how it was phrased, but it was something along the lines of “Pandemic Rages On With No End In Sight”. As I mentioned, I don’t remember the exact wording but I DO remember how I felt reading that- depressed. I tend to not watch network news because I noticed some years ago that there seems to rarely be GOOD news; lots of death, destruction and gossip though. For the last year, the newspapers and general media has been milking the sensational nightmare of the Novel Coronavirus.

          Covid-19 began making in earnest American headlines around February of 2020. That is over one year past at this time. As of late, I have a difficulty considering Covid-19 to continue to be called “novel” because usually, the term “novel” implies “new” and often “temporary”. In early spring last year, the novel coronavirus efficiently and swiftly swept across the nation, sending probably the entire American population into a collective panic. Different people reacted differently, but I think it’s fair to say most people were terrified, or at least unusually bothered. When the pandemic came to my state of Minnesota, I reacted to it the same way I react to almost anything. I spent hours poring over research, data, studies and anecdotal accounts.

          Initially, I concluded that the virus was primarily airborne, supremely deadly, and unpredictable. The pandemic did not start in the United States; other countries had been dealing with it for weeks or months. I read studies that described the molecular structure of the virus as to be so small that it could be aerosolized and due to its miniscule weight, could take 20 minutes or so to sink to the ground. As a public health nurse, I looked to the CDC for answers. Incidentally, this is when I lost faith in the good intentions of the CDC. Their recommendations were to stay home as much as possible, wash your hands, avoid standing near others and avoid sick people. I can’t recall exactly what the recommendations were but they were saying generally “this is a symptomatic disease, and likely not airborne”. These recommendations did not seem to align with the studies I had read or any other general conclusions coming from the other countries who had been “infected” for some weeks or so earlier.

          I became suspicious of how it was that a “stay at home” mother, with some masters work in public health and no background in creating or administering a scientific study could find so much information contradicting the CDC in about 7 hours of online research. How was it that a huge organization filled with doctors, PhDs and scientists would not reach the same conclusions which the CDC later confirmed by summer of 2020? Initially, face masks were not recommended. Testing for the virus was unavailable and there was no contact tracing system in place that I was aware of.

I used to aspire to work for the CDC. Now my trust in them had wavered, to say the least. I used to accept their recommendations on most health subjects. After a year in grad school pursuing my master of science in public health, I had already been taught epidemiology. I also have a substantial background in exotic and tropical diseases due to several years working as a medical travel consultant. This novel coronavirus was not the first epidemic in the US. Not even the first pandemic. There had been epidemics and major public issues before. I did not understand the CDC’s secretive approach at all for this virus. The CDC even has an “outbreak response protocol”, which is logical, clearly stated and applies to everything from E. Coli outbreaks being traced to certain vendors to the seasonal flu. I wondered why this protocol did not seem to be occurring at any level of government health groups. They were treating Covid-19 as if all prior outbreak rules and experience were thrown out the window.

          Shortly following the (likely) inevitable spread of the virus to Minnesota, the freshman Governor of our state, Tim Walz declared a statewide emergency, which made sense at the time. However, this also seemed to cement the government’s control over everything having to do with the pandemic, which apparently was every aspect of life. Walz had just been elected Governor a few months prior to the pandemic. He ordered schools closed for 2 weeks (“to flatten the curve”) and closed most businesses with the exception of pharmacies, gas stations, grocery, liquor stores and chain department stores that sold groceries. The government endorsed reasoning behind this was “we know we’re all going to be exposed, so let’s try to minimize the entire population being sick at the same time, get our hospitals prepared so that we don’t end up with the entire population in emergency rooms at once overwhelming the health care system”. Seemed like a reasonable enough idea, although I DID wonder Well, maybe EVERYTHING should be closed for two weeks and then maybe the virus will not spread at all? However, I pushed my doubts aside since I had no decision making abilities anyways.

          However, once two weeks had passed, the emergency seemed to be either unaffected by the “lockdown” or the rhetoric changed to “we’re going to keep this at emergency level until further notice”. So two weeks became six, which then became months and now it’s been over one full year that the emergency is still at its peak or even worse. There have been constant messages by both the media and some government officials that “the worst is yet to come”. Is it though? Many people all over the world died from Covid-19, some did not die but had lingering damage to organs but many simply got sick for a week or so and bounced back.

In the spring of 2020, most people did not have access to be tested for the virus. This continued for a very long time. So, initially, most of the cases that we heard about were the severe ones- in which the patient had died or came very close to death. I had a more moderate experience. I got sick in March or April 2020. For about a week, I suspected that I was going to die. But I didn’t want to go to the hospital just in case I was wrong OR to surround myself with other sick people and catch something else that would do me in. So, I filled out a living will sort of thing, outlining where all my important documents were kept and all that, took every anti-inflammatory medication I had hoarded over the years, forced myself to eat and drink and lay in bed having mild hallucinations. After a week or two, I was feeling well enough to put trash into the trash can. From then on, I continued to feel mildly confused much of the time and had a swollen ear drum for a couple more months. It lasted all summer, really. Individual experiences with the virus have varied from asymptomatic (fairly common) to cold/flu like symptoms to death (which in the total number of infections has remained rare). So, that was my experience.

Over the summer, I met a woman who was involuntarily placed in a hospital psychiatric unit. She was in her late 60’s and had been living in a retirement home for years due to a moderate physical disability. She came to be in the psychiatric unit because after six months of isolation within the nursing home, she attempted suicide. She was not the only resident to be isolated- all of the residents were prohibited from interacting with others, both within the community and without. As far as I was told, she did not have a history significant for suicide attempts or other serious psychological disorders. She told me, “I am old, I’ve lived my life, I was lonely and I couldn’t stand it anymore. I was going crazy being alone all of the time. No visitors, no pets, no interactions with anyone. I felt like it was time to end my life”.

Would this woman have attempted suicide if she had not been isolated from nearly all human contact for several months? No. No, she wouldn’t have. Isolation is a form of psychological torture that has been used historically mainly in prisons as punishment.

Minnesotans had been experiencing an almost continuous isolation for almost a full year. More often than not, there is no in person school, people are not allowed to gather in small groups, holidays have been essentially canceled, Minnesotans are being mandated to not see anyone outside of their household, ever. The rules change sometimes, but overall, we’ve been isolated from each other. I used to celebrate Jewish holidays at a synagogue. I can’t do that anymore.

My son used to look forward to going to school to interact with other kids, now “school” is him staring at the computer for hours. He was an accelerated math student. Not anymore. He used to get services for autism. Not anymore. He hasn’t played with another child since the summer, when we would go to the playground. Not anymore, not in Minnesota. It’s too cold.

My daughter is four years old. She does not understand why she has nowhere to play. It’s affecting their mental health. It’s affecting my mental health. We used to go to the art museum. Not anymore. My kids are depressed. Schools may be opening again, but for how long? Kids are also failing in this distance learning model. All kids are being affected, but those with a lack of access to technology in addition to increased barriers to special education, barriers to sports, barriers to mental health services are particularly affected. These children are supposed to be the future. What kind of environment is this to raise healthy children??

I am concerned about the increased number of suicides in our state. I am concerned about friends I’ve lost last year to drug abuse during the pandemic. I am concerned that this is going to become “the new normal”. Violence by youth is up, I believe as a direct result of lack of structure. Many people have no way to get physical exercise as gyms have been on almost permanent lockdown since March 2020.

Governor Tim Walz has had “emergency executive powers” for over a year. Some Minnesotans are fighting it, some have already moved away, some have given up. The icing on the cake for Minnesotans is that none of these measures have been proven to stop the spread of covid-19. But these measures have been proven to destroy Minnesota- financially, emotionally, educationally, and effectively. In the course of one year, it feels as if we are on the brink of a partisan civil war. It’s past time to end the Governor’s dictatorship of the state. 

Where are the cost-benefit analysis for the mandates? Where is the public attention for kids and seniors that are so lonely, they want to die? Where is the publicity for the majority of kids literally failing school? Why are we ignoring all of this? How bad do things have to get before the real emergency is dealt with? As bad as Nevada, where youth suicide became such a problem that the government mandated schools open? The warning signs that our state is crumbling are here. Please heed them. This should not and cannot be the “new normal”. This imposed isolation is unsustainable at best and killing more Minnesotans than the actual virus at worst. We need to start healing our state before the executive branch of government completely eliminates representatives and we are in the position of seeking refuge elsewhere. I am not leaving my home state.

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Thoughts on Freedom of Speech in an Orwellian Time: 2084

“Cancel culture” supposedly started with the “me too” movement a couple years back. As a woman and a feminist, I supported women speaking out about sexual harassment. I still support it.

I am not sure if that truly qualifies as “cancel culture” now in 2021 (or as I like to call it 2084) as almost everything is being censored. I have never, ever seen so many “liberal” white people angry about everything. And yes, it does seem to be people who have declared themselves as “liberals” who are silencing others.

I’ve noticed that it IS usually white women (who fancy themselves as the voice for the oppressed, I suppose) taking offense at everything including asking simple questions like “I didn’t get my saliva COVID test in the mail, did you get yours?” The reactions are over the top, illogical and immature. I was called a “Nazi Fascist” for suggesting that black and white people could probably work together on some things. I was called this by a bunch of white “liberal” women. I was shocked. Do people even know what a Nazi or fascist is?

It used to be that questioning things was good. Questions used to be a encouraged, expected, even. We are currently in a society whence questions (even about the mundane) have become unacceptable. Many fear asking questions as some of us are being ostracized for asking “well, do I really need this vaccine?” Unacceptable question now. It is also unacceptable to question the government. This is dangerous. Abraham Lincoln warned that if the United States were to descend into tyranny- it would be at the hands of our own people.

Freedom of speech is very important. Americans who don’t support freedom of speech make no sense to me. Why would anyone WANT censorship? The book 1984 is one of my favorites. It’s a classic. It was probably even banned at some point. All the other rebellious teenagers I grew up with read 1984 and denounced “Big Brother”. As an adult in 2021 in the US, we’re rapidly approaching this dystopian society. Censorship has become trendy somehow. Erasing history and banning books is en Vogue. I never thought I’d see the day that I would be arguing with the same teenagers I grew up with who seem to now be wanting “Big Brother”?! What changed? Is it the whole “I didn’t sell out, I bought in” thing? Because that’s how it’s coming across.

There are a number of stand up comics, black, white, women, Asian, every type of person- all for free speech. It’s not even a liberal/conservative thing. It’s a slippery slope to silence people for anything, really. I don’t use hate speech, I don’t agree with hate speech. But should it be completely illegal? I don’t know. Maybe. But once you go after someone for using a term like, for example, “kike”- what’s to stop people using other terms, terms that have been adopted into communities and reclaimed by those who are meant to be disparaged by such terms.

I like “heeb”. I AM a “heeb” and I like joking around too. Do I have family members that died in the Holocaust? Actually yes. I never met them of course, having been born in 1981, but I have visited Israel and my German Jewish sort of second cousin by marriage- her whole immediate family was incinerated. I would have loved to talk to her more but unfortunately I speak neither German nor Hebrew. So communication with this cousin was mainly gesture based.

Things are constantly changing. They say “the only thing you can count on is death and taxes”, but I think the only thing you can count on is that every element of the universe is constantly changing, for better or for worse. Astrophysicists recently found that every element in the periodic table “move” constantly. And we already know from chemistry and physics that those elements can change and form new elements under various circumstances.

Any effort to homogenize individual thought is going to ultimately be futile, as it is not natural by the laws of science or reasoning that this is possible. Our genes as human beings even resist homogenization. When you inbreed, you have problems because too much of anything leads to problems. You don’t have to be a scientist to know that.

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Clowns

When I was a kid, maybe eight or nine years old, I was enrolled in the “Big Brother, Big Sister” program. Coming from a family in which I was the only sister to my three younger brothers, I really appreciated my “big sister”. Lisa was in college at St. Thomas and we did things like drink Diet Coke and play truth or dare. Lisa also liked to buy me little keepsakes, mostly journals and books. I liked the journals and books; I loved to read and write.  

A few months into our budding sisterhood, for some reason that I cannot fathom now, my sister Lisa started buying me these dolls.  I don’t recall having a particular fondness for dolls and these were no ordinary Barbie or Raggedy Ann dolls. They were these elaborately painted ceramic clowns with ornate satin costumes. In retrospect, I would call the dolls “noir”, in a way. They were not happy clowns. Their faces were lifelike, but weary, as if they had already seen too much of the world. They were certainly not meant to be played with. At my age, I had never really experienced the idea of a toy to not play with.

The dolls also came with individual display stands inside their large and partially transparent boxes. The clowns ranged in size from about 8 inches to more than a foot and a half. This was the 1980’s, I don’t remember if there was a sad clown doll fad or not, but I think I remember being with Lisa in the mall one day and seeing such a clown in an upscale gift shop and Lisa asking me if I liked it and I must have said yes or had some sort of positive reaction. To be agreeable, of course. As it turns out, I should have been honest and said “they’re a bit creepy”, but how was I to know what would follow?  To be honest, I may have manufactured that memory in order to make sense of how these clown dolls ended up becoming such a bane to my existence.

It was not very long until I found myself the reluctant recipient of one such decorative clown. After receipt of the first clown, I brushed it off as a curious but isolated incident. However, I must have too enthusiastically accepted and given her the impression that I was a serious collector because the clowns became a regular gift, almost as regular as the diaries. I recall liking one clown. It was very feminine with bubblegum pink paint and white and pastel pink ruffles. Even as a child, I could appreciate couture to some level. Perhaps that was the first clown, because they progressively became larger and more frightening from then on.

I could not tell Lisa that the clowns scared me. After accepting a half dozen of them with false enthusiasm, I was too deep into it. I didn’t consciously make the connection between these garish porcelain clowns and the evil child-eating clown portrayed by Tim Curry in the Stephen King movie “It”, which I had recently seen with my elderly Persian grandmother. However, I did notice that I had begun to develop anxiety around these clown dolls. The clowns were stored out of sight in a closet, buried underneath things I would never have a use for. I hoped that the clowns would go away on their own, but that hope remained unfulfilled as apparently, the mother of all decorative clowns was soon to be bestowed upon me. A reckoning was coming.

The final clown I got from Lisa was the largest yet. I don’t know where she found these dolls, but this one must have been nearly half my height. The most imposing stationary clown I had ever seen in person. Real people dressed as clowns had never frightened me that I can recall. It was the glassy eyes and the ivory, motionless skin of the dolls that awoke a sense of fear. The possibility of demonic possession seemed very real in some of the more sinister looking clowns.

The night that Lisa had gotten me the clown doll to trump all others, I was sleeping in her dorm room (as I often did), in the living room on a couch-alone. The clown was stationed directly across the room from me; I was right in its line of sight. The clown appeared to be watching me out of the corner of one painted eye across the room. I tried not to make eye contact and a couple times looked away, and then glanced back to find that it seemed to have crept a millimeter closer to me. I was almost in a state of panic. I felt imminently in danger and could not turn my back to this clown. I didn’t even want to breathe too heavily for fear that it would notice me, come to life, and attack. I was not sure exactly what the clown would do to me in terms of physical harm, but it was obviously menacing. Who knows what these clowns are capable of? And did I really want to find out?

I lay rigid and sleepless most of the night on the couch, uncomfortably aware of my potential assailant in the corner resting (waiting?) against its display stand. At some point, Lisa came out of her room, noticed that I was wide awake and managed to pry the truth out of me. The charade was over. Somehow, Lisa made the connection between me having seen “IT” at the age of 8 and my fear of clowns.

You see, my grandmother had shown my three younger brothers and I the IT entire mini-series on tape. Bless her heart, she sincerely believed that because there was a clown in the movie, it was funny and appropriate for small children. She truly thought that we would love it. I am not sure about my brothers, but for me, not a single night passed for the next several years that I was not plagued by dreams of murderous clowns of every variety. Almost thirty years later, I remember the details of some of these nightmares.

When I confessed my embarrassing secret to Lisa that not only was I afraid of clowns at the time, but I had also been afraid of them for awhile, Lisa realized that pretty much all of the clown dolls she had given me were resulting in anxiety and nightmares, and thankfully, she was very understanding about my white lies. I was ashamed that not only had I been lying to her by pretending to like the clowns for months, but I was also old enough to know that porcelain dolls really don’t come to life and kill people- in theory. I was embarrassed about it for quite awhile, so much so that I avoided her for some weeks afterwards. Despite the fact that she had also seen the movie and insisted that I was definitely not ridiculous at all for being terrorized by a collectible clown, I remained a bit ashamed for years. In retrospect, it must have been pretty comical for her to realize that with her limited college student finances, she had spent a moderate amount of money on accidentally scaring the hell out of me. How could she have possibly known that my clueless, foreign grandmother would show a Stephen King movie to little kids?   Even at the time, I recall my grandmother being confounded that we children were frightened by the evil clown that lured children into the sewer, severed limbs, ate them and could emerge from any water pipe it desired, not to mention a career defining performance by Tim Curry that helped bring the movie to life. When I revealed to my mother that my grandmother had subjected all four of us children to this four part bloodbath, my mother was furious. Many expletives in Farsi ensued.  

I received no further clowns following the revelation that what I felt for them was the opposite of gratefulness. If there was a lesson to be learned from this, perhaps it would be that one should not pretend to like a gift, for that gift may become a curse. Or maybe the lesson is that it’s better not to let a person who thinks Stephen King is appropriate for children babysit your kids carte blanche for extended lengths of time? I suppose I learned both.

What happened at the block party

Here’s what a couldn’t post to FB because of censorship.

The guys there were telling me their penis sizes. I didn’t ask. I don’t know why they were saying that. One said “you’re a nurse, you should suck my dick”.

I took a photos of the place afterwards. And one of the vehicles there. By the way, they were also smoking I don’t know what.

Mask Links – more to come

https://www.zerohedge.com/covid-19/cdc-buries-study-showing-student-masking-has-no-statistically-significant-benefit

https://www.infectioncontroltoday.com/view/cloth-masks-are-useless-against-covid-19

https://www.cidrap.umn.edu/news-perspective/2020/04/commentary-masks-all-covid-19-not-based-sound-data

https://www.bmj.com/content/371/bmj.m4586

PCR test-

COVID19 PCR Tests are Scientifically Meaningless

Liberty Mix and Mingle Champlin, MN

Also known as the re-election fundraising campaign for House Reps Lucero, Bahr, Heinrich and Mekeland.

“The Mingling

I was running about 20 minutes late. So maybe it was my misunderstanding or I missed most of the “mingling” part, but prior to the speeches starting- which would continue for the next hour and a half, I spoke with Rep McDonald and Rep Cal Bahr first. I overheard them arguing about whether the emergency powers were unconstitutional and knew I had to be a part of that conversation. Bahr was saying it was “technically legal” while McDonald disagreed on the basis of the churches being shut down. I was actually the one who brought up shutting down churches. We ended up not coming to a consensus on this.

Attorney General hopeful Dennis Smith on the left. Rep. McDonald on the right. Didn’t catch the name of the woman in the middle.

Before the speeches really started, there was the pledge of Allegiance to the Flag and a prayer from a black minister- think his name was Tim. I had my son with me and we are Jewish so that part was a little bit awkward.

Lucero: the first thing that Lucero discussed was false accusations of being a RINO. I was unaware of these accusations and he didn’t detail where they came from nor what they were exactly. I have been following Lucero for several months now and he has never struck me as being a “lazy politician”. It seems like he’s quite active, both in making bills, making appearances, public speaking and pretty much what you would expect a representative to do. Lucero also took a moment to highlight that the media ignores what he and most of the Republican Party has been doing in Minnesota.

Examples included multiple attempts to impeach Walz, authoring bills to stop Vaccine passports and other relevant actions. Will attach a photo of his flier.

Lucero spoke the most about the issues I care about- which are stopping the unilateral abuse of power by the Governor and stopping the fairly obvious attempt to turn the US into a communist empire. He said communist even. Later Reps would water it down to “Democratic socialism”.

Rep Cal Bahr spoke next- I liked him because he seemed more straightforward than others. He spoke about campaigning in ones district, day to day activism, helping to undo the brainwashing (he didn’t put it that way, but I think that’s what it boils down to). He applauded the grassroots efforts of Minnesotans occupying school board meetings. He mentioned Walz’s abuse of power and it was at that point that I started shouting out questions. My question was “how does Walz still have so much power when he has admitted IN PUBLIC that there is no public health emergency anymore?” That’s not made up. He’s said that- repeatedly.

Talking with Gazelka:

Bahr answered my question, sort of, but at this point I was distracted by Paul Gazelka standing in the back of the room and resolved to interrupt his conversation and see what I could find out from him. But I led with, “I troll you on social media, I don’t think you have the votes to run for Governor, are you really planning on that?” He said “yes, I feel like I should- I have the backing of the Gun Owners Caucus, the NRA…” and I said “but you realize if you don’t win, we’re getting four more years of Walz and that will destroy us”. He acknowledged this but I don’t think it sunk in.

I asked him “why do we still have Jan Malcolm? She works in PR! I am a nurse and as such, this whole thing is, well, infuriating. Is it because she’s a lesbian, you are worried about backlash from that community?” He said “it takes 34 senate votes to get rid of a commissioner” and told me a personal story, at which point I told him I’m not a reporter and that I’m not taping him. Which was both true.

Gazelka made it clear to me that removing Jan Malcolm was simply off the table. I did commend him on the removal of the environmental commissioner. That was clever. Surprisingly (to me), Gazelka was calm and classy through the entire conversation. I didn’t view myself as so much being rude as “just giving it to him straight”, which is how I like to get my information also. Plus, I didn’t know when I’d be getting another opportunity to dissuade him from gambling our state like this- so I seized the moment.

Having a Cigarette Outside With the PR Guys:

At this point, I was whisked away by two guys who were not dressed up. One of them was maybe in his 30s and the other one I incorrectly assumed was his son, but turns out they’re both working on the PR issues- specifically social media. I was thrilled to see that after complaining that the media doesn’t cover them- the republicans at least were making a PR effort, something I’ve been repeatedly pushing for since I left the Democrats last year.

One of the Reps joined us, explaining that we had to hide in back because public officials have to smoke cigarettes in secret haha. It was true though. I mentioned that I was quitting at 40- which is coming up- and he said “oh yes I said that too, also said that at 30 and 20”. This Rep was the sort of person I could get along with.

Anyways, I exchanged info with these guys, they were mostly confused about who the hell I am and what I do. I am not sure I fully explained myself and I didn’t have a rote answer to that either. “I am trying to save Minnesota?” That’s my agenda, basically. And I run a social media group and seem to have some talent for writing and research.

Back Inside The Speeches Continue:

Lucero was back on deck. He was addressing issues that I knew had come up many times amongst people I’ve spoken to- election integrity, mostly.

I think Lucero said he was part of the lawsuit against our Secretary of State, Steve Simon that lost at first but is later won in the court of appeals?? I may have info wrong here but I am almost certain Lucero said “(Simon) is in defiance of 3 cases of election fraud”…will double check on this.

There was discussion of election integrity involving 2022 Biden- this was brought up by Child Protection League member and President I think, Michelle Lentz. I don’t recall if there was a clear answer although I reference to Simon (I believe) Lucero said that the win in the court of appeals “affirmed” direct quote- “affirmed election fraud had occurred”.

Rep. Carlson from Crawford spoke for a few minutes again about the media misrepresentation of republicans and the omission of their positive actions. There were further calls for volunteers- door knocking, running for office, running for school board. It was then revealed that the PR guy I exchanged contact info with was their new media director.

Second Amendment Talk:

Rob Doar- political director of the Gun Owners Caucus then spoke for a few minutes about how he was working to protect second amendment rights. I can’t say I was completely on board with his story illustrating his support as it was a controversial story. He discussed how someone who I think was charged with some sort of domestic issue had his gun taken away- which if the guy is guilty- it’s my opinion and fact that he shouldn’t have a gun as guns and abusers don’t mix very well- I think the statistic is that having a gun around an abuser makes homicide 100 times more likely. I’d have to review that, however.

Anyways, he made his point- the republicans are absolutely going to support gun ownership.

Somehow, impeachment of Walz came up again and this time it was framed as “but we’ll be left with Peggy Flanagan”. I had learned by now to stop yelling out questions and rather started writing notes and having my son deliver them.

For some reason, maybe it was because Gazelka had seemed more laidback and accessible- I wrote him a note stating “the left is tearing Flanagan apart on Line 3, let them fight. The left is splintering and that’s essential for us to recover our state”. And it’s true. The Democrats are no longer one party. There are the ones that are more like me 5 or 10 years ago and there are ones that are totally okay with destroying the state and it’s people to create a new order and eliminate any semblance of representative government.

Tiff with Senator Matthews:

I can’t recall who it was who said “they’re completely doing away with police officers in Minneapolis” which is old news but okay- this was my last outburst. I hollered “what do you think about Biden’s push for UN Peacekeepers across the ENTIRE country??” Oh wait I remember who it was- Senator Matthews. His response: “not my district”. I was shocked into silence. I was thinking “maybe not yet, but it’s coming, so you all are going to have to be ready for this. Unless you’re okay with it!” Oh, I also asked about libertarians. I just said “where do you stand on libertarian involvement?” A decent answer was made “we’re happy to have them involved” although I think a better answer would have been “we will work with anyone that’s fighting along side of us!”

Matthews also threw his support behind Gazelkas run for Governor. Gazelka then grabbed the mic one more time to remind us of Senate File #1- supporting business? I don’t know. Things seemed a bit chaotic at this point and I overheard Mekeland saying nobody had bid on his gas card. They had a raffle, not sure if I mentioned. So I went over to the table and “drunk bid” on everything I was even mildly interested in.

Gazelka Brief Speech:

I don’t know if this was news to anyone but he basically announced that he is running. What went from “probably” was now a certainty. He mentioned House File 8 and House File 9- which I’ll have to look into. Gazelka says his other big issue- in addition to protecting gun ownership is crime. That’s when things got more interesting.

The Most Interesting Part of the Evening

An audience member told us about the Minnesota Freedom Fund (which I already knew about) but also talked about a larger celebrity freedom fund which is basically paying bail for criminals being charged with some serious crimes- like murder. So if there is bail set, murderers are walking away much more easily with that bail help. Personally, I see no justification for murder and think murderers are pretty much the worst of the worst. I’m a pacifist- I only believe in using violence for self defense.

The minister or whatever he’s called- sorry I really don’t know!- he grabbed the mic and yelled at everyone in the room. It was epic. He said “listen up White people! The cities are overrun with crime and YOU think you’re safe out here! You’re not!” So I piped up and said “hey, I’m in the suburbs and crime is up where I live too!”

He said “thank you!” And gave the mic back to whoever.

Representative McDonald from Wright county spoke and it was a moving speech about human rights and it was obvious that McDonald is very much a Christian. He was inclusive, however, in discussing Judeo-Christians and overall, I did tune out a bit but he seemed so genuine. He also celebrated the overflow of people showing up at school boards to object to CRT. He encouraged us to run for school boards. I hated to mention that I had heard that school boards were on the chopping block and that the state may be taking over public schools completely.

The Evening Concludes with Me Shooting a Few Dirty Looks:

So, they hustled us out of there pretty quick after the speeches. I was informed that I had won every raffle I had put in for- the wine basket, four tickets to any Twins game I wanted to attend, and two gift cards.

In exchange, I got some personal phone numbers. I think. I have not tried them yet. Very interesting evening and you better believe that there will be a follow up article to this- more like a letter- to the republicans I met the other night filling them in on how to not lose the state.

Also I had a final glass of wine and complained loudly at the bar about “we the people” and “why couldn’t we ask questions” and this is our state…to my son but loud enough so that everyone who walked past me and may have doubted whether they are a RINO or not would hopefully be stepping up their game. I also unabashedly had a cigarette right in front at a table.

No More Masks On Children, period.

ACLU and the federal constitution trumps any state mandate. ACLU guarantees children the right to equal access to school.

Negative health effects of masking children:

https://www.city-journal.org/masking-children-unnecessary-and-harmful?wallit_nosession=1

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2021/07/28/us/florida-anti-mask-protesters-school-board-meeting/index.html

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2021/07/28/us/florida-anti-mask-protesters-school-board-meeting/index.html

Kangaroo Court- Family Law Corruption

Work in Progress by Kristina Tehrani 7/27/2021

I found out a few years back that civil court is basically bullshit court. There is no penalty for perjury- in fact, it’s expected. The law is completely ignored and I mean, completely. There appears to be no greater kangaroo court than family court.

There are published laws to family court. The laws and the practice do not intersect. The reason for this is multifold.

First, nobody in family court cares about the actual laws. The claim is that “the child’s best interest should be protected” but the practice is that “we will tolerate this best interest crap while it suits us but we don’t like to work so if you think you have a better idea, we don’t want to know. Agree with what we say or we will destroy you and your baby”.

Nobody told me that when I was looking for an attorney with my newborn premature baby in the dead of winter. Her father sued for joint everything immediately after she was born. Nobody seemed to care that he didn’t want a baby and made that abundantly clear to anyone who would listen. He attempted to drug me while pregnant with his baby. That didn’t work. He tried to have me psychiatrically committed while I was pregnant. He had found out that stress can contribute to miscarriage because I had one with him already. A miscarriage although he told any of my family members who would listen that I “made the whole thing up”. The pregnancy. Four months later, he couldn’t deny any ultrasound. We had agreed that we would have a child. I was at a point in my life where I no longer believed in love and believed in “working together” instead.

He claimed to agree with this. He and I were on the verge of splitting due to his manipulative behavior, refusal to do chores, verbal abuse, sexual abuse and attempting to control and manipulate my psychological records. I had just decided to leave my medical position, as that felt unfair also. The company had gotten to a point where the supervisors like myself we’re not allowed any breaks- not even a minute to use the bathroom. Not only that, but I was expected to work from home without pay. So I drafted my letter of resignation and decided that this boyfriend was next.

Ironically, this month we had had an unprotected encounter once. One time. One 20 second increment in my life and that was it- I was pregnant again.

I reconsidered my plan to leave. I decided to give him “one more chance”. This following a long period of all kinds of abuse. Nobody told me that murder is the number one killer of pregnant women. I found out through research.

Almost everyone I knew told me “have an abortion. Save yourself”. But I couldn’t. The reason that I couldn’t was that I had one at the age of 14 and it really depressed me even though it was probably the right thing to do at that time. I knew afterwards that once my body was fully mature and strong- I wouldn’t ever be put in that position again.

I was wrong. I learned that being harassed, stalked and tortured are very harmful to a pregnant woman. And on top of this- I was physically exhausted. Normal for pregnancy. It took my doctor, who wasn’t even that great, to tell me “you stress about the stalking and won’t get a restraining order, you WILL lose this baby”.

Backing up to the relationship itself, the problems did not start with the pregnancy. There had been problems for almost the entirety of the relationship.

I had known this man, Paul, for years. He was dating a friend of mine and we would double date with them frequently. As cigarette smokers, and our partners not being smokers, we found ourselves frequently talking outside while smoking. Paul seemed charismatic, funny, calm and normal. We didn’t spend time together without our significant others though. He lived with his girlfriend and I got the idea that it wasn’t a great relationship, but never gave it much thought. I was too busy ending my relationship, which also involved divorce.

A few months after ending my relationship, I reached out to Paul to basically complain about my ex. I discovered that Paul had also left his girlfriend and was sleeping on his bosses couch. Why he was crashing on a couch at the age of 40, I don’t know. He had his own thriving business. Another thing I didn’t give much thought to.

We went out for drinks, which turned into a date. Which turned into several dates and a relationship. He wasn’t really my type- he didn’t discuss politics or art. He didn’t seem interested in philosophy or history. We just didn’t connect very well on an intellectual level. However, my last relationship having been a roller coaster ride to hell- I welcomed the banality.

He wasn’t boring, and he was “good on paper”. No baggage that I could see. Out of practicality on both of our parts, I had him move in with my son and I after several months. That’s when things started to change.

Less than a month after moving in, he scheduled a back surgery. He was on prescription pain killers for his intolerable back pain. So, it seemed to make sense for him to fix the problem and get off the drugs. He drank too, whiskey- a lot of it. I knew that probably wasn’t a good idea mixed with pain medication.

After a nights stay in the hospital, he came back home. He had probably five bottles full of different prescription pain medication. It became clear that he was abusing it right away as he was completely incoherent for a good week. I was alarmed and began to regret my decision to have him move in.

He seemed to enjoy circular arguments that went nowhere and at times, would video record me without my knowledge to “show me” my inappropriate behavior during arguments. And we argued about EVERYTHING. I started to wonder if the arguments had nothing to do with the subjects we argued about but more to do with sport on his part. Some “arguments” would last for hours before I would give up thinking “this will never go anywhere”. He is not hearing me and no matter how I phrase things, not getting through.

What I thought was communicating, he considered “arguing”. That meant any request I made an invitation for him to have a tantrum, fake cry, give me the silent treatment or spout a bunch of gibberish. And it WAS gibberish- he made up words, used words the wrong way- he made no sense. I later read that this was a common tactic of people who are manipulative.

On one occasion, he faked a seizure during an argument. I did not know what to do, I had never seen such a thing- I didn’t know if it was real or fake. I got my answer when I dialed 911 for medical attention for him. He made an instantaneous recovery. The police showed up in record time and not only was Paul NOT writhing on the floor, he was perfectly coherent. The police left and Paul never had another “seizure”.

On another occasion, Paul and I were sitting on my bed arguing about therapy. I wanted him to go to therapy with me to resolve our communication issues and he didn’t think we had communication issues. After about an hour, I became so frustrated that I decided I needed space and started to head for the bathroom, which has a lock on the inside. He grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me back so hard, I fell onto the concrete floor, hitting my head. It didn’t occur to me to call the police for this- which was held against me in family court.

The arguing could be anything from “can you put away your dishes?” To “can you please take a left at the light?” To just about anything. I began to censor myself around him. But even being extremely careful about what I said- there was still room for bickering. So I stopped verbally interacting with him completely.

Once I stopped engaging in the arguments, he nitpicked at my behavior. He accused me of plucking my eyebrows too much. He told me I didn’t clean well enough, that I was eating the wrong things. Everything I did was wrong. My existence was wrong. The tension when Paul was around was palpable. I didn’t speak a word to him and he spoke to me through my son.

In the fall, I got pregnant. I knew immediately. I could just tell and a pregnancy test confirmed it after a couple weeks. I was very stressed to take sleeping or anxiety medication because of the possible effect on the baby.

Paul did not seem thrilled. He barely acknowledged it. Meanwhile, I was both anxious and exhausted from lack of sleep. I continued to work but I was miserable. In the end, I had a fairly early miscarriage- confirmed by my gynecologist.

Paul denied to me- to my face- that I had ever been pregnant. I was flabbergasted. I had no response for that other than I was beginning to realize that this relationship was toxic, if not all out abusive.

I had it my head that abusers were always physically violent. It didn’t occur to me that abuse can be manipulative, verbal and emotional. I didn’t even notice when it seemed that I spent no time with friends. It was work, taking care of my son, and avoiding Paul.

My mental health was deteriorating. I was mourning the miscarriage while being told it never happened, my partner was constantly telling me I was crazy and delusional, I had no friends to talk to and I felt trapped and alone. I later found out that Paul had been secretly calling my mother every week and “updating her” on my mental health, which according to Paul, was fragile, at best. He also told her and others that I invented the pregnancy.

I eventually ended up checking myself into the hospital for psychiatric care. Although the real reason was that I needed to be away from Paul. I wasn’t suicidal, hallucinating or having an extreme symptoms, but I was very tired. A friend came a visited me after a couple days in the psych unit and talked me into discharging, which the doctors fully supported- given that there were people there who needed psychiatric help more than me. I needed to break up with Paul.

I was beginning to plan my break up with him when I got pregnant. If things were bad before, they were hellish now.

To be continued…

For Kathleen….Wherever I May Find Her

By Kristina Tehrani July 26,2021

I’ve been a nurse for many years- about 13. I haven’t been working the entire time but I have several long term experiences under my belt.

One of my favorite nursing jobs was working for the GLBT population in an inpatient drug and alcohol treatment program. Why? Because it was fun and I learned a lot.

Also, even though my medical background wasn’t very extensive, my desire to learn and dedication quickly elevated me to a position of “charge nurse”. This is significant because there was literally NOT a doctor in the house. It was me or whoever else was the charge nurse.

My patients, for the most part, were gentle, kind and patient. They told me jokes and helped me with getting my hairstyle right for Halloween. If I forgot to put on eyeshadow- no problem! They had it! Sometimes it was hard to remember that this was a facility and not having coffee with friends.

I worked with some of my favorite nurses of all time there. It’s amazing how much you can learn about someone by their behavior alone. You don’t even need to know how to spell their last name- you know them through and though.

One such nurse was Kathleen. I loved her from the get go as she was brutally honest, yet somehow tactful and she was emotionally supportive to…everyone I think.

I had fallen on difficult times. I was married to a violent alcoholic and I had just gotten the diagnosis that my son had autism and that needed to be dealt with immediately. I was exhausted. I knew next to nothing about autism and that was frightening.

I was never opposed to taking antidepressants, but at this time, I didn’t have a doctor I trusted. Therefore, I screwed around with my medication myself (never a good idea).

Mornings were notoriously busy at this facility. Basically, four hours were spent on getting all 40 patients all of their medications plus checking vital signs and anything unexpected coming up.

One morning, I showed up for my usual day shift as charge nurse and Kathleen asked me “how are you doing?” I started to sob like the titanic was sinking. Her response? She shut the door and I said “what about the patients?” And she said “don’t worry about it”. She hugged me and let me cry on her shoulder for probably ten minutes while I choked out that my husband is not who i thought he was, that my son had autism, I don’t know what to do and I need a new psychiatrist….

So I cried it out, with the promise that I would adjust my medication.

Kathleen was kind to me like that. She was kind to everyone like that. I never thanked her.

Management changed after a year or two and the facility was looking to cut costs. They had already fired our highest ranking and by far most knowledgeable nurse. They were cleaning house and everyone knew it. My time came eventually. I didn’t do anything to really be fired for- especially after four years of loyal service. But they got a new nurse manager who didn’t seem to take issue with random firing.

Nobody wanted to fire Kathleen. She was well loved by patients and staff alike. I eventually found out that she was forced out of her position because they really had no grounds to fire her. She had worked there for at least 10 years.

I went on to public health nursing, which I also loved but I didn’t have a staff- it was me as charge nurse always. It was lonely. Plus I was involved with a man who didn’t want me working at all.

Once I got pregnant with my daughter, I left my last position for medical reasons. Then I had to deal with other things, like my newborns medical issues. And a custody battle that seemed to have a slash and burn feeling to it. It was the closest example to guerrilla warfare that I can imagine but worse as it attacked ones identity and faith in the law.

After that long two years, I was in no rush to associate with people (they can’t be trusted!). Maybe a year later, I felt safe enough to make a Facebook account to maybe (maybe!) connect with friends from “before”.

Kathleen requested to be my friend pretty quickly. I was thrilled to hear from her after all these years . She was insistent that we meet up soon so that she could meet my daughter and revisit with my son again. I was trying to schedule something with her when I got the news from another nurse friend.

Kathleen died. 60 years old- heart disease. I never got to thank her for holding me while I cried. I went to her mass (didn’t occur to me that she was catholic and pretty dedicated to it). My first outing in four years consisted of a Catholic mass. I realized that although Kathleen had died l- it didn’t mean I had to also. And completely isolating oneself from friends is a form of slow suicide.

I vowed to appreciate life and live it. No more hiding out at home because people are unpredictable. No, I was going to live the life I still had.

One month later, my state shut down and prohibited seeing people from other households. This lasted for over a year. The timing seemed almost biblical. A woman who loved life died and now I’m back in isolation- this time by mandate.

Taking My Continuing Education Credits to Keep My License…Bunch of BS so far.

Taking a 2 hour credit course on Covid-19. I would say that the information is not only inaccurate, vague and out of date, but also sources are questionable at best. This site literally is using CNN as a source of medical information. Because CNN is not biased and it’s a respected medical journal. What’s next?

So this course (which lots of nurses are taking), teaches us that Covid-19 originated in a “wet market” and passed from bat to cat to human. That’s what they’re saying. I heard Fauci recently admit that it came from a lab. From the words of our new Mengele himself. Plus everyone knew there was a whistleblower who mysteriously died from China. But no, we’re going with the other narrative.

They then detail how China covered up first SARS outbreak HOWEVER, we are going to continue to rely on their ongoing honesty. So we don’t learn anything from China covering up SARS.

The nursing education both claims that the virus is extremely frightening but also has a less than 2% death rate. Further, pretty much everyone who has symptoms will end up with deadly pneumonia and die. Soon. First they have all the other symptoms- many of which I had when I was sick with it- BUT you can count on pneumonia and kidney failure shortly thereafter.

So, I actually have had two chest X-Rays following my illness with Covid-19 and they were both clear. No pneumonia. Also, my kidneys have not failed. Not even close. You know how I can tell? My skin isn’t turning yellow. Kind of a classic sign of kidney failure. Oh and heart attack. Yep, expect that too.

I had COVID-19 last year- more than a year ago. Couple rough weeks including some confusion but I didn’t want to go in unless I was sure it was necessary. I decided if I couldn’t breathe or had symptoms of heart attack, I would go in. Didn’t happen. Since I recovered, I’ve had a full blood work panel and all cardiac enzymes are within normal range. And my kidneys did not fail. And no hepatitis. Or pneumonia.

I sincerely hope that other medical professionals are critically thinking, but I don’t know.

Oh, and also the contradictions within the education are notable as in “stay 3 feet away from people”, “super deadly but rarely kills” and “the only coronaviruses that can infect humans are alpha and beta type. Not the now infamous “delta variant”.